


Final Destination

by mishaxllins



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-31
Updated: 2014-07-31
Packaged: 2018-02-11 05:40:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2055855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mishaxllins/pseuds/mishaxllins
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I wrote this fic around 2 months ago now and have finally finished it! Based after season 9 so do not read unless you have watched it! ((Unless you don't mind spoilers))There are some references to Marvel and possible others, I don't own anything etc.</p>
<p>Castiel finds Sam in a drunken state and tells him that he thinks Dean is still alive.<br/>They both discover something in a twist and struggle to tell him. However, none of them know of Crowley's whereabouts when Dean had briefly opened his eyes. Dean later learns of his power and discovers Castiel's true form for the first time!<br/>lots of things happen...</p>
    </blockquote>





	Final Destination

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this fic around 2 months ago now and have finally finished it! Based after season 9 so do not read unless you have watched it! ((Unless you don't mind spoilers))There are some references to Marvel and possible others, I don't own anything etc.
> 
> Castiel finds Sam in a drunken state and tells him that he thinks Dean is still alive.  
> They both discover something in a twist and struggle to tell him. However, none of them know of Crowley's whereabouts when Dean had briefly opened his eyes. Dean later learns of his power and discovers Castiel's true form for the first time!  
> lots of things happen...

1\. Castiel had scrupulously stayed away from Sam for days now. He could not bring himself to face it. He could not bear the pain of seeing the man he saved time and time again, now lying there. Death had been an inevitable force to the Winchesters but this time? Castiel had not been able to save him. He felt the pain and suffering in his gut. Even as an angel, Cas still had human feelings. He could hurt and he could cry. This is what he chose to do; grieve the death of his best friend. He could hear Dean Winchester in his head yelling at him. “You didn’t save me, Cas!”  
To which Castiel wrenched with fury and replied with “I’m so sorry.”

Over the past few hours, Castiel had tried everything to get Dean back. They (the demons and the angels) all laughed at him and refused. They were all exceptional. Almost victorious!  
This only made Castiel angrier. He couldn’t do a single thing. He was no longer the saviour. He had failed woefully.  
Castiel’s phone rang eagerly. It was Sam. He was the only source of contact he had left. Everyone else had abandoned Cas, including some of his own brothers and sisters. He sighed deeply and continued down to the jail where Metatron was currently being held.  
Castiel had to put on a poker face or else he would not make it out of there alive and his emotions would betray him. It was weakness.  
“Hello Castiel. I don’t suppose you’re letting me out of this cell any time soon?” Metatron hopelessly tried.  
“No.” Castiel replied shortly.  
“Lovely. In that case could I have some sort of entertainment? It gets boring down here.”  
Castiel lost it.  
He roared furiously in Metatron’s face without thinking and yanked the chair out from under him, making Metatron crash to the ground spontaneously.  
Castiel pulled out an angel blade and slashed at Metatron’s face, immediately drawing blood across his cheek and there was a faint, white, blinding light as he yelled out in pain.  
Castiel smirked, tempted to finish the job.  
Unfortunately, Metatron was needed in helping to open the gates of heaven again.  
“How do I do it Metatron?” Castiel practically spit out the words.  
“Do what?” Metatron said sarcastically and tranquilly.  
For that, Metatron received several blows to the abdomen and face.  
The pain was bearable enough for him to still talk, which is what Castiel wanted. He looked like a professional torturer with the way Castiel stood; tall and proud as he smiled in an evil way. It didn’t look right on Cas. He was usually so calm and peaceful. “Funny what being in love can do to you” He briefly thought to himself before burying it down deep and forgetting it for the meantime. It was almost too easy punishing Metatron for he had been the one to kill Dean Winchester.  
“YOU don’t. I have to do it.” Metatron gave in and told Castiel the truth.  
“Why is it only you?” Castiel’s eyes narrowed.  
“I’m the one who started the spell. Therefore, I must be the one to end it.”  
“Tell me what you have to do.”  
“If I do this... Send everyone home? Will you let me go freely?”  
“I will consider it.” Castiel wanted to kill Metatron, never mind let him go. He must have known this, however, because Castiel’s reply told Metatron that it was never going to happen.  
“Then no. I’d rather sit in this pit for the rest of eternity.”  
“Metatron I will torture you until you are barely breathing and I will repeat this for the rest of your eternity unless you make this spell correctly and send everyone home back where they belong.” Castiel threatened darkly.  
“You mean, like you? Who intends on staying on this planet because of your pathetic human love?” Metatron tried to retort with attitude but the glint of fear in his eye told Castiel that he had hit a weak spot and he finally felt like he was getting somewhere with this pathetic waste of space for an angel.  
“You killed Dean Winchester. I will go home with the rest of our family.” Castiel wanted to add: “because you stole the only happiness I had left” but he remembered the façade he was supposed to be keeping up.  
“What are you talking about? I didn’t kill Dean.”  
Metatron received another fatal blow to the abdomen.  
Castiel hated Dean’s name on Metatron’s tongue.  
“Look! Okay, I may have killed him but it doesn’t mean he’s dead.”  
“What are you talking about?!” Castiel was loosing patience.  
“He isn’t dead you idiot!”  
“How do you know?” Castiel raised an eyebrow in refusal to believe him but something in his gut wanted him to believe so desperately.  
“I didn’t feel his death. His soul never left the body.”  
“Are you saying?...”  
“That’s exactly what I’m saying.”

 

Castiel marched out of the jail as two angels who stood by nodded at Cas and locked the cell back up.  
Castiel pulled out the phone from inside his left pocket in his beige trench coat.  
The phone dialled and dialled.  
It seemed to take several minutes before Sam answered.  
“Hello.”  
“Sam! Thank goodness. Are you okay?”  
“I tried calling you. You never answer, Cas.” Sam said monotonously.  
“Sam I’m sorry but you have to listen to me. I don’t think Dean is dead. I don’t know what Metatron did to your brother but he told me that Dean’s soul never left his body.”  
“Cas, what are you talking about. Dean’s right here. He’s not moving and hasn’t moved since he was...”  
“Hold on, Sam.” Castiel hung up the phone. It was time he visited Dean with his own eyes. He understood that it would be the hardest thing he has ever had to do but it was worth while if Dean was to make it out of this alive. At this point, Castiel didn’t even care what state Dean was in as long as he was alive and okay. It was a single thread of hope that Castiel clinged on to.

There was a thunderous flapping of wings before Castiel appeared in front of Sam Winchester. Castiel opened his mouth to speak instantly but one look at Sam was all it took to render him speechless. Sam’s hair was astoundingly long as it now reached his shoulders and hung in negligent waves. His facial hair was now a messy beard that desperately needed shaving and he sat down on a small chair which brought out how ridiculously tall he was, long legs stretched out in front of him, wearing casual grey sweats and no socks on his feet. Glass of whiskey in hand and bottles, not one but 3! On the also small yet rounded table just in front of him. He wore a casual black shirt and nothing else. No other ridiculous, numerous layers of clothing.  
The TV had not been turned on and the whole room stunk of alcohol. Sam momentarily glanced slightly up, before letting his head hang low, staring at the red carpet below him. This only made Sam’s grief worse as the colour reminded him of Dean; of his blood on Sam’s hands and holding him upright with all of his strength. The strike of panic and horror was evident on his face.

Castiel snapped Sam back into focus as his head slightly lifted again to face the angel standing before him. He felt a hand on his shoulder and suddenly they were in the bathroom, no better yet, they were standing in the white bathtub. “Sam? Have a shower and clean yourself up. I will get you some clothes. When you come back out all the alcohol will be gone and you will stop feeling sorry for yourself, am I clear?”  
Sam’s eyebrow creased. He could not believe he had just been told off by Cas. Suddenly he could not hide the dark chuckle that escaped his lips and he barely stood, hunched over slightly from the whiskey that had made him weak and dizzy.  
As more minutes passed, Castiel sighed impatiently and began turning on the shower for Sam, adjusting it to a temperature he think would be suitable and then proceeded to walk back out of the bathroom closing the door behind him as he found out some: jeans, a shirt, a plaid over shirt and some clean underwear, including socks. Castiel walked back into the bathroom briefly, being careful of where he looked, which was mostly on the floor, as he placed the clothes down in front of him and marched back out, closing the door behind him a little forcefully for the last time.

It took Sam precisely 24 minutes to clean up properly and walk out of the bathroom fully clothed, beginning to sober up. During this time, Castiel had busied himself with cleaning the motel room. Sam still looked unpleasant due to the thick dark circles under his eyes which indicated immediately that he had not been sleeping, his hair still ridiculously long and beard still apparent. But nothing a little trim wouldn’t do and a hearty meal at that!  
“Cas…I… Look, I’m sorry okay? I acted like a jerk.”  
Castiel almost smiled. He could imagine what would have happened if Sam had said that to his brother. Dean would have simply replied “bitch.”  
“No you didn’t. You’re grieving. In the wrong way, yes, but I understand Sam.”  
“He’s my brother, Cas. He’s the only family I have…. Had… left.”  
“I know this may surprise you, but you Winchesters are the only real family I have left. And despite not being related, I love you both dearly.”  
Sam crookedly smiled at Castiel’s words as they warmed his heart. But Dean is gone…He’ll never hear those words.  
“Get him back?” Sam whispered hopelessly.  
“That is what I came here to do... Hopefully.”  
“Are you saying you can do this?!” Something inside Sam awakened.  
“I’m saying I might be able to do this.”  
That was all the hope that Sam needed. And he wasn’t about to waste time, either.  
“What do we do?!”  
“Where did you put Dean?”  
“He’s ummmmmm… kinda in his car? I didn’t know where else to put him. I couldn’t bury him Cas, I just couldn’t do it.”  
“It’s okay Sam. Let’s go.” Castiel reached a hand out to Sam’s shoulder for the second time that day.

The heavy, high pitched wail of the trunk creaked open to reveal an unconscious, bloody Dean Winchester.  
Castiel couldn’t hide the gasp that escaped him and his eyes slightly widened with shock. He had not seen Dean for a few days now; however it felt like an eternity.  
The sight of seeing him for the first time was not a pretty one. He looked pail-ish, had blood stained everything! And worst of all, seemed disturbed.  
“We have to move him upstairs.” Castiel stated.  
“Why?” Sam asked slightly confused.  
“Because if Dean is going to wake up, it would probably be better in a more suitable environment, don’t you think?” Castiel explained, forgetting that Sam was not, in fact, a telepath.  
“Oh yeah” Sam replied stupidly.  
Castiel bent down slightly, tears already forming in the corners of his eyes as he placed his hand over Dean’s right cheek silently whispering “Hello Dean”.  
Then, Castiel carefully carried him out of the trunk, one hand under his knees, another behind his neck, wary of supporting all of his weight. Sam slammed the trunk, looking slightly impressed, but not wanting to give it away, before closing the door and locking Dean’s precious. Castiel lazily placed a hand on Sam’s arm this time, whisking them all back to the motel room momentarily.  
Castiel marched to the bed and gently placed Dean down, making him as comfortable as he could possible. He stood there for a moment, simply watching over him. Now that Dean was in a better environment, he looked more peaceful.  
“What do we do now?” Sam asked, worry apparent in his voice.  
“Now we wait.” Castiel replied softly.

After five minutes had passed, Sam began to panic.  
“Should I hit him or something?” he suggested.  
“No. We don’t know what mental state Dean will be in when he wakes up. And, father forbid, he may not even remember us. I’ve healed the apparent physical wounds that I can and have cleaned up all of the blood. He’s had a concussion. I’ve healed that too of course, but there may still be some damage.” And that was as deep as Castiel’s conversations went with Sam Winchester. Except for the kind words he expressed earlier.  
“Thank you for the vote of confidence Cas!” Sam’s voice heavy with sarcasm.  
“That is worst case scenario of course.” Castiel tried to reassure.  
“Of course.” Sam breathed out a sigh.

 

The words replayed in the back of Sam’s and Castiel’s minds.  
Don’t be dead. Don’t be dead. Don’t be dead.  
It was exhausting.  
Sam tried for a different approach.  
“So, what do we know? How is he doing?” Sam asked wearily.  
“Well. Like I said before, physically, Dean is fine. But mentally... he would have to let me in… which at the moment is impossible.” Castiel tried his best to make Sam understand.  
“Yeah, but… what if Dean wakes up and he’s not even human? Like, Metatron was down there for a while before I could get to him. Maybe he turned Dean into an angel or something?” Sam cleverly asked.  
“Not possible. I would have felt it.” Castiel concluded. Oh if that were true! Dean would make a beautiful angel. But Castiel thought that he would much prefer to stay human. They are remarkable creatures.  
“Alright. Is he breathing at least?” Sam desperately hoped.  
“Yes he is.” Castiel smiled for the first time in a week.

Another two hours passed and Sam was beginning to lose his patience.  
“Can’t we at least… I don’t know splash water on him or something?”  
“You can try. We can’t do anything dangerous though.” Castiel agreed wearily.  
Sam grabbed a water bottle out of the tiny blue cooler in the motel room and returned. In miniscule amounts, he began pouring the water all over Dean; however, there was no reaction so Sam poured even more, concentrating solely on his face.  
This time, Sam saw Dean stir in his unconsciousness. Castiel also picked up on this as his eyes narrowed, locked on Dean, with such intensity that Sam slightly worried Cas would burn a hole right through him.  
Sam abruptly stopped pouring the water over Dean as he miraculously let out a spluttered cough.  
Castiel and Sam stood extremely still, rooted in their place by an invisible force.  
There was more coughing.   
Sam was almost hyperventilating from the shock.  
Until slowly, finally, Dean’s eyes flew open.

Castiel and Sam both held their breath tightly as they held on to see what sort of state Dean would be in.  
“What the hell?” Dean asked hoarsely.  
“Where’s all this water coming from?” Dean started coughing again from thirst.  
He licked his lips, taking in all of the water from his face that he could get.  
Castiel was still holding his breath oblivious to what he was doing.  
Sam rushed up to Dean, forcing the bottle to Dean’s lips before he rolled his eyes and snatched the bottle from his hand.  
“I’m not a damn baby, Sammy.” Dean said sulkily.  
Sam held his hands up in defence.  
“Wait here!” Sam huffed out before jogging away to go and find him some more clothes as Castiel still stared at Dean.  
“Close ya mouth, Cas. You’re gonna catch flies.” Dean teased and chuckled to himself.  
Castiel blinked and suddenly became aware of his surroundings again. Cas closed his mouth and started breathing, inhaling sharply at his desperation for air.  
“How long have I been out?” Dean whispered. He could see Castiel’s agony on his face and had seen it in Sam’s too as he woke up, which only made him wonder.  
“You’ve been out around a week. But Dean, you must understand, your soul refused to leave your body. It’s a miracle you’re still alive.” Castiel whispered back.  
“Oh. Honestly, I don’t know how I’m alive! What have you and Sam been doing?” Dean rolled his eyes as he pictured them both, sitting in a chair depressed for the whole week solid. And then Dean felt the anguish. He probably would have done the same thing if it was one of them two.  
“Dean. I did everything. Everything!” Castiel burst out, tears pricking up in the corners of his eyes.  
Dean sat up slowly, being careful not to get a head rush, which only resulted in that anyway as he went blind for a few seconds. When he recovered, he got right to his feet and practically leaped over to where Cas currently stood. Dean opened his arms and threw himself at Cas holding his face before moving on to his head and then finally, his back.  
“It’s okay Cas. It’s okay.” Dean murmured to him, repeating himself constantly until Cas allowed himself to relax.  
Tears built up in Dean’s eyes, making him blind once more.  
Castiel wanted to punch Dean for allowing him to get killed so stupidly; but another part of him wanted to kiss Dean senseless because he was back.  
He listened to the second part of him and grabbed Dean’s cheeks in his hands, firmly kissing Dean on his mouth. Castiel pulled back worried that Dean didn’t want to but his head was brought back to his as Dean’s lips softened allowing it to last. They wrapped their arms around each other tightly.

When they broke apart, Castiel and Dean were smiling through tears. Tears of joy that is, not sorrow! Castiel’s eyes, with an amazing blue trait, reminded Dean of the sky. And Dean’s, green. So much green, they reminded Castiel of a forest full of trees, such beautiful nature.  
“Hmmm mmmm.” The sound broke them from their trance as the younger Winchester stood there looking utterly awkward.  
Dean took almost the entire room in two short, yet long strides over to Sam as he embraced him in a tight fit bear hug only two brothers like them could pull off.  
His arms were thrown around Sam as he returned the favour.  
“You’re not gonna kiss me, right?” Sam guffawed.  
Dean blushed and carried on hugging Sam so that he wouldn’t see him; however the smile had not disappeared from his face by the time they had finished.  
Sam handed Dean the fresh new clothing he had gone to get him and Dean decided to take a nice hot shower too before changing.

 

Sam and Cas were sat content watching the hypnotizing television screen in front of them. The sound buzzed in their ears at a comfortable volume as “The Avengers” played on one of the many channels available.  
Of course, Castiel being himself felt he needed to ask 1000+ questions about the film.  
“Cas. I just wanna say… I know you won’t but I got to say it anyway just because we’re brothers, but you hurt him and I’ll kill you.” Sam beamed at him.  
“And also, I’m really happy for you guys and it was about time. I didn’t think I could stand it any longer the way you two look at each other.” He added.  
“I’ll try my best.” Castiel replied softly, smiling back at him crookedly.  
“Do we really?” He asked a minute later.  
“Really what?” Sam asked.  
“Look at each other a lot.” Castiel actually sounded surprised.  
“Yes! Of course!”  
“Oh.” Castiel was wondering whether Dean really loved him the way he did.  
“He does love you. Trust me. You don’t see him sometimes. It drives me crazy.” Sam snorted.  
“What drives you crazy?” Dean said, showing off his looks and smiling like an idiot.  
Castiel beamed at Dean, enjoying his view.  
Sam rolled his eyes at Dean but still smiled anyway. He had finally got his brother back. Heck, he was allowed a night off to be happy for once!  
Dean walked over and plonked himself down right in the middle of his two favourite boys, scooting them to the sides to make room.  
Sam made a “do I have to move” groan but moved anyway.  
“Ah cool! The Avengers! Love this movie!” Dean instantly started watching it.  
They were currently at the part where Captain America was fending off aliens as a police officer stood by close looking shocked and amazed at the same time.  
The movie had almost finished but none of the three cared.  
“Now you can answer all the questions.” Sam called over to Dean whilst pointing at Cas.  
Castiel slightly blushed as he said a sheepish “Sorry”.  
“It’s okay Cas; I’ll answer them for ya.”  
“Thank you.”  
And it didn’t take him long before he did!  
“Forgive me for implying if this is incorrect, but are the... err… lady and her male friend supposed to be partners in this movie?”  
“You mean romantically? Well! I’m not actually sure Cas but Widow and Hawkeye have a history together so who knows?!” Dean was impressed that Cas had been paying so much attention.  
“What does the male in the starry suit do?” Cas mostly wondered this to himself, but Dean overheard and answered for him anyway.  
“That’s Steve Rogers, A.K.A Captain America. He can run super fast and has a lot of strength etc. Cap’s awesome! And you see that there? That’s his shield, takes that thing around everywhere!”  
Those sorts of questioned continued right up until the movie had finished.  
By that time Sam was peacefully snoring in the air, his head flopped back on the couch.  
……………….

2\. “SAM!”  
He shot up like a bullet.  
Sitting in the chair, he looked around, panicked.  
“Sam. Get up. When Dean wakes, you’ll be the first person he’ll want to see.”  
“What...”  
I’ve just dreamt…all of this? Sam thought to himself.  
He looked down at where he currently sat. Sure enough, he was showered and dressed. They had got Dean back. He was still lying there… on the bed...  
“Damn it!” Sam did not control the outburst.  
Castiel looked startled and vastly confused, his patience wearing thin.  
“What?” Castiel simply asked. Clearly, something was wrong with Sam.  
“I just… I had this dream… Cas, he was back! He was here awake and you two…Oh my god! I dreamt the whole thing?!”  
“I think you may have imbibed too much alcohol. I don’t understand.”  
Sam got up, his knees weak and he wobbled.  
“Was none of that true?” Sam whispered to himself, ignoring Cas.  
“Cas, where was you?” Sam needed to know what had happened; struggling between reality and dreams.  
“I was with Metatron. He told me Dean is still alive. That’s when I came here and we got Dean out of his car. We brought him back in here and then you fell asleep again. You’ve been out for a few hours” Cas told Sam slowly, worried that Sam had gotten a concussion from swallowing too much brown liquid.  
“So… you and Dean didn’t… And we didn’t watch “The Avengers”… and you’ve been with me here?”  
Castiel was completely oblivious to what Sam was talking about. Instead he focused his energy on watching Dean to see when he would awake. That single thread of hope that both of them held on to in complete desperation.  
Sam’s dream must have been vivid. He had thought that Dean was awake, which only proved how much they needed him back.  
Castiel’s heart broke at the thought of Sam loosing Dean. They are brothers and would die for each other in an instant without blinking.  
Sam sat still, wondering, wishing that their lives could have actually been like his dream. At least they had been happy there. Reality kicked in as he realised life sucks and happiness cannot exist for the Winchesters or anyone who comes into contact with them. They get dragged down too.  
An apple pie life.  
Sam wished.

The most bloodcurdling scream ripped from Dean’s chest.  
Sam shot up and immediately went to Dean’s side.  
Dean was now sitting up with a wide stare and Sam sharply took in air with shock and horror.  
The worst thing for Sam? He had felt the trepidation of Dean not being human.

“Maybe he (Metatron) turned Dean into an angel.” Sam had asked.

Sam tried his absolute hardest in tearing his eyes away from him, but now all he saw was black, black, and black.  
“Sammy?” Dean whispered painfully.  
Sam ignored him because Dean wasn’t himself any more. A demon had took over his body and Sam was damned if he wasn’t going to get the vile thing out of him.  
He bent down, snapping into focus, grabbing Dean’s wrists and holding them, preventing the demon from attacking.  
Dean merely sat there bewildered.  
“Cas, get me some salt!” Sam shouted at the angel.  
Meanwhile, Cas had been standing there, completely frozen, drilled into spot.  
The look of horror on his face was surreal.  
“Cas?!” Sam shouted harshly.  
Castiel blinked, being brought back into focus, slowly turning his head to look at Sam as tears threatened his eyes.  
“Sam?” Dean whispered again.  
“Shut up! Get out of my brother!”   
“What the hell are you talking about?” Dean sighed.  
“I said shut up!” Sam was trying to fight it as hard as he could; he knew he couldn’t listen to him now. Demons lie.  
“Sam it’s him. He’s telling the truth.” Castiel whispered dismally.  
Sam hadn’t heard Cas apparently, as he pulled out a Demon knife and held it tightly to Dean’s throat.  
“Oh come on Sammy! You’re not really gonna kill me?!” Dean shouted at him, worried for his own safety.  
Did Sam think that Dean was… a demon?  
“Sam! It’s really him! It’s Dean!” Castiel shouted impertinently.  
“What?!” Sam huffed out incredulously.  
“It’s him. I don’t know how but it… I can see his soul. There is no one else occupying his body. It’s really him Sam.” Castiel seemed to be breathless.  
“Are you… serious?! What’s going on Cas?!” Sam was turning hysterical exceptionally quickly.  
“I don’t know!” Castiel shouted at him, immediately regretting it as he saw the look of confusion and heart break on Sam’s face.  
Dean went to move, which was a mistake, as Sam quickly averted his gaze to coal-like eyes and merely pointed the blade at him, daring him to move.  
Dean slowly put both of his hands up in surrender, mentally waving the white flag.  
Sam panicked, shuffling his feet slightly before punching Dean across his right jaw, knocking him out.  
Castiel rolled his eyes.

3\. “I told you, no one has taken over his body.”  
“I don’t care. He’s my brother, Cas. I can’t just…Leave him, or even the demon free?”  
“I know. I understand that but don’t think he’s a threat. I don’t even think he knows…”  
Muffled noise.  
Blearing, blinding light.  
Metal.  
And then everything flooded back into focus.  
Cas. Sammy.  
“Whoa! Cas!” He could see Castiel’s true form! Why?! His wings! They were the most beautiful and magnificent attribute Dean had ever seen. They were as dark as night and full of feathers. Healthy, even. And they looked especially comfortable. However, they were colossally tall and quite threatening. They hugged Castiel as if they were living, breathing creatures on their own and would do anything to protect him. Dean surprisingly felt a twinge of jealousy at the close intimacy. A radiant light glowed from Castiel. It was still incredibly blinding, staring into his soul. He actually saw the compassion and hope. As light often symbolises purity, that’s what Castiel is. Pure. Castiel’s angelic nature suits him well.  
Sam, pointing the blade still at Dean witnessed the gawking at Cas as Dean’s mouth shaped a silent O shape. Dean felt like an idiot. Sam clearly was not seeing the same as him.  
“Okay. I don’t know who or what you are, but I’m gonna need you to help me get my brother back.” Sam tried to act dangerous, but it was difficult because he didn’t even know what Dean was or even, if it was really him.  
Dean simply rolled his eyes.  
When was he ever going to get through to Sam?  
He glanced down and realised why he had smelt metal.  
The handcuffs were tied to him and he sat in a metal chair that was incredibly uncomfortable, leaving him incapacitated.  
A strong scent of sulphur hit.  
It must have come from previous tortures of Demons.  
Unless Crowley decided he wanted to show?  
However, there was no sign of a long dark coat or the sarcastic drawl of his voice.  
When Dean glanced back up to Sam, he seemed to be struggling with his emotions. Sam started out seeming relieved at something, probably because Dean was alive. And then he had gotten angry, weirdly. Then there was shock. And finally, terror.  
It confused Dean intensely.  
The only thing Sam had to be terrified of is what Dean would do once he got out of the damned hand cuffs!  
Sudden rage.  
“Why am I angry?” Dean thought.  
It only got worse as he realised who his anger was projected on.  
“That’s your brother damn it. Get it together, Dean” He told himself.  
Focusing on calm thoughts and the love he had for the two currently in front of him helped immensely.  
Sam’s eyes widened till his eyebrows hit his hairline.  
Green.  
That was definitely green!  
Those dark soulless eyes had changed back to his original emerald state.  
Castiel and Sam both did not think that they could miss a colour so much in their lives.  
“Dean?” they whispered simultaneously to him.

 

Castiel had just shown emotion; something he swore to himself he would never do.  
But this was Dean. The righteous man he had gripped tightly and rose from perdition. If only Castiel had broke the angel tablet sooner. Dean would still be a free man. He hated the doubt he had of exactly what Dean was. He hated that this made him doubt his best friend. But mostly, he hated the way he had to tear his eyes away from the true form and the way it made Cas feel sick to his stomach. It was hard for anyone who had seen it to explain, but he looked like hell. Literally, like a dark, bottomless pit as a creature of the soulless. Castiel felt ashamed. He couldn’t even properly look Dean in his eyes. His beautiful, green, everlasting eyes were now as dark as the damned.  
“Dean. We need to tell you something.” Castiel blurted out as the words escaped his lips.  
“No! We don’t.” Sam scolded at Cas.  
“Sam.” It sounded like a question.  
“No.”  
Castiel held up his hands in surrender.  
“No. What?” Dean piped up. If those two were hiding something, he deserved to know.  
“Just...” Castiel started.  
“Cas.” Sam warned.  
“Trust me.” Castiel commanded firmly.  
“Dean you…You’ve…been out for a week. Sam and I thought… we thought that you’d gone.” Castiel finally finished.  
Dean’s eyes softened with understanding.  
He wanted to bear hug each of them because in all honesty, Dean thought that he would never see them again either.  
“It’s okay guys. I’m here.” Dean reassured. Or, tried to…  
Castiel was acting ominous, even more than usual.  
“He’s looking anywhere but at me?” Dean thought. The look of guilt was clean on the nerdy dudes’ face. They needed to talk.  
“Sam. Err…can I…talk with Cas here a minute?” Dean tried not to offend Sam. He is his brother and should probably be speaking to him first, but this swirling vapour of fog clouding around Castiel was doing all of them no favours whatsoever.  
“…yeah…” Sam blinked and walked slowly out the room, looking back at Castiel as if he were unwilling to leave the room. Cas nodded once and Sam obeyed, ambling out and forcing himself to do something constructive like making coffee.

“How’re you doing Cas?” Dean started.  
“I…I’m fine.” Castiel stammered. He didn’t even try making himself sound believable.  
Dean could see right through the non existing façade.  
“Okay…How are you, Cas?” He tried again.  
“Terrible.” Funny how just one word from someone can be enough to break ones heart. Dean knew that this answer had been coming, but as vocal confirmation? It hurt.  
“Why?” Dean hauled.  
“Because you…I…We though that we had…lost you.” Castiel whispered, constantly thinking of what he should or shouldn’t say.  
“So?” Dean huffed.  
“Don’t. Don’t you dare say that to me. Do you have any idea of what it is like... after so many years, to loose someone extremely close to you?” Castiel’s voice cracked.  
“You know I do.”  
“Precisely. So do not say ‘So’ as if it would mean nothing to me. I was supposed to be the one to protect you, to save you! I had to break the angel tablet because it was the only way to stop his power and I should have done it sooner. It’s entirely my fault. A few seconds earlier and you never would have…”  
“It’s okay. You did everything you could. I understand Cas, but you can’t carry all of this weight on your shoulders. Not you. Please Cas, I’m here now? If that counts. Cas? Look at me man.”  
“I can’t.” Castiel cried through gritted teeth.  
“Why not? Because you should have saved me? Because I’m a mess? Because you’re worried that I’m not really here?” Dean responded with empathy. He stretched out his cuffed hands as farthest as they would go until he could grip on to the long, beige trench coat covering Castiel’s arm.  
Cas didn’t reply. Instead, he looked down at his sleeve and ever so slightly and softly, ran a finger across Dean’s hand.  
“Hey. Come ‘ere.” Dean whispered.  
Castiel sunk down to his knees, facing the ground sprayed over with a red pentagram. The one thing in the world which usually made no difference, suddenly made a huge difference.  
At eye level, dean was able to reach out to his full durability and catch strands of falling, exiguous tears with his thumb.  
“I’m so sorry.” Castiel sobbed.  
“It’s okay Cas. It’s okay.” Dean constantly repeated, desperate for Castiel to let it all go. The sweet seraph placed his forehead on Dean’s knee in anger and defeat.  
Slightly taken by surprise, Dean gently placed both of his hands on Castiel’s head and lent his body forward to place a kiss in his chocolate brown hair.

When Castiel finally gained enough serenity to stand back up, he realised that he was going to have to tell him. He risked an agile glance in Dean’s direction, marginally lifting his eyes from the insignificant floor. Dean’s eyes were not that awful coal colour anymore; however, he could still see Dean’s true monstrous form.  
As much as he didn’t want it to, the fright overwhelmed Castiel. Dean’s worst nightmares were about to come true. Dean took one look at Castiel, saw how distraught he still looked and asked “What’s really going on? Sam must think I’m stupid, but I know he’s hiding something from me. Actually you both are. Spit it out.”  
Castiel did not know where to begin. The beginning of course! Was what ran around his mind, along with millions of other thoughts that were deafening. It was evident that this was going to take some time before Dean would accept it, so Castiel took his time to process those thoughts until finally, he began to start stringing along a despairing speech.  
“Dean. You most definitely are not going to like what I have to say. But you must remember that Sam and I are going to do everything in our power to help you-”  
“Ah crap! Something wrong with how I look?”  
“No. Dean it’s not just how you are on the outside, I’m talking about all of you physically. Do you remember when we told you that you had been unconscious for a week and we thought you had…? Well, we really did think that. Honestly, it’s a miracle that you’re alive. And, well, Sam didn’t want me to tell you, but you’re going to find out anyway.”  
“Okay...?” Dean urged.  
“I’m sure you have been feeling quite indignant since you awoke? And you are most likely seeing my true being now?” Castiel asked.  
“Yes! How do you know?” Dean commanded.  
“The truth, Dean, is that you have…become a demon.” Castiel’s eyes narrowed, his face scrunched up into a ball as his worry intensified immensely when Dean did not say anything.

Castiel waited an eternity before he received a reaction. And that reaction was the exact opposite of what he expected from Dean. His eyes suddenly creased dramatically in the corners as he looked like he was fighting off an uproar of laughter.  
Castiel briefly closed his eyes and sighed deeply. Today was going to be exceptionally long. “I can prove it to you.” Castile suggested.  
“How?” Dean asked under muffled laughter.  
“I need you to get angry.” Muttered Cas.  
“I’m not Bruce Banner, Cas! What the hell is going on?!”  
Castiel marched around the room, trying to find items that would prove his statement.  
At last, he decided to try his luck with a silver, squared mirror. It had a rounded handle at the bottom and was incredibly old fashioned. For some, the mirror would be more of an artefact than an object. It was in desperate need of repair, a crack going down the mirror diagonally from the top left corner to the bottom right.  
“Cas?! Get back here and tell me what’s going on! ‘You’re a demon’ what kind of crap is that?! You never lie to me Cas! Is that it then? That’s all you’re gonna say? Awesome!”  
“I’m sorry Dean. I realise that wasn’t the best way to tell you.” Castiel endured Dean’s anger. It was a step to acceptance…hopefully.  
Castiel braced himself as he held up the damaged mirror in front of Dean’s face.

Dean’s breath hitched in his throat as the shock slowly overwhelmed him.  
Countless times he blinked, each time no different to the ugly thing he saw in the reflection staring back at him. The darkness he saw in his own eyes was eccentrically blinding. Dean’s entire body abruptly went numb and the hunter was no longer able to feel. The mirror thudded to the ground face down as the whole mirror smashed into hundreds of various pieces. As if on queue, Sam Winchester walked into the room with such perfect timing.

4\. Sam walked into the dungeon looking immensely stressed as he ran his fingers through that long, thick, brown hair. He looked at Castiel who frankly, just seemed suspicious of something. Oh God… Sam was panic stricken. He could not escape one thought running around his mind over and over again. He knows.  
In an instant Sam had turned his head again, now staring at Dean and those deep onyx eyes. One look at Dean and it was enough to confirm what he had been thinking the second he looked at the betraying angel.

 

Sam strode up to where Dean was currently sat, ignoring the shards of glass that crunched under his brown suede boots as he shouted “Hey? Dean?”  
Dean merely stared at his own hands as if there was something transparent on them to Sam’s and Castiel’s eyes and only Dean could see. Was it blood? Or the texture of his skin, if demons even had skin. Ignoring all of this, Sam reached out hesitantly and placed a hand on Dean’s left shoulder. And if you were very quiet, you would be able to hear the sharp intake of breath Castiel made. Dean lifted his head lethargically and flinched. “Hey! Hey Dean? It’s me. It’s Sam.” He tried with paramount desperation. “Sam?” Dean blinked all traces of onyx gone from his eyes. “Yeah! Yeah, Dean it’s me! It’s okay” Sam breathed out with solace. He removed the hand on Dean’s shoulder and brought them round to either side of his face before removing them again to awkwardly hug Dean as best as he could in a sitting position. Dean’s forehead collapsed on Sam’s shoulder and he sobbed.  
“I don’t wanna be a monster Sammy.”  
“We’ll find something Dean. We can fix this. That’s what you always tell me. We’re gonna save you, me and Cas. Okay?”  
“What if you can’t Sam? What if I try to kill you? I can feel the rage inside of me and I can’t…”  
“Don’t say that. You’re my older brother Dean, you won’t hurt me, and I know it! I love you and we’re gonna help you. ”  
As Sam broke away from the hug, Dean nodded once as he eventually replied “Ok.”  
Cas didn’t dare to say anything. Tears had fallen. He wished his family could be how they are. So supportive and caring and who would risk everything they had, including themselves, for each other. That was how they showed they love each other. He hung his head in grievance and guilt for those whom he’d lost. Gadreel, Gabriel, Balthazar, Anna, Samandriel… there were too many. Some of them were even Castiel’s own doing.  
“Sam? You gotta leave me here. If I flip, things are gonna get ugly.”  
“Yeah, and I already told you that’s not gonna happen.”  
“Sam, please. Just do it?”  
“Fine. But I’m leaving the door open; you can call me any time. Do you want me to get you anything?”  
“Ugh. Nah. I’m not even hungry or anything.”  
“Well, what are you gonna do down here by yourself?”  
“I’ll just…talk to Cas! While you figure something out.”  
At this, Castiel’s head rose and his eyebrows creased.  
“Cas, you good with that?” Sam asked, still slightly pissed that he’d told Dean in the first place, but he was getting over it.  
“Um, yes. If you’d like.” Castiel agreed.  
“Okay well, I’ll go then. Hey maybe I should talk to Crowley? See what he has to say?”  
“No! He’ll love it too much.” Dean insisted.  
“Okay... No demons.” Sam concluded and turned to start heading towards the library.  
“Could you bring me some books? I could still be useful down here.” Castiel quietly suggested.  
“Sure.” Sam answered shortly. There was still some tension there.  
“I’m sorry for going against your word Sam. He had to know.” Castiel quickly tried.  
“I’m not getting into this Cas. I still think I should have been the one to tell him later on but what’s done is done now. Don’t worry about it.” Sam finished.  
“Okay.” Castiel said ashamedly.  
“For the record? I made him tell me. Be mad at me not him.” Dean told Sam.  
With no reply, Sam left the room.

5\. “Don’t listen to him. For what it’s worth I’m glad you told me. He wouldn’t have!” Dean reassured.  
“Does it matter? I let him down. I let both of you down.” Cas replied miserably.  
“No. No you didn’t. It’s not your responsibility to save me Cas, it’s mine.”  
“Yes but you are still a demon.”  
Dean sighed deeply and rolled his eyes.  
“Come here.” Dean’s simple command was obeyed.  
The angel slowly shuffled his feet forward until he stood directly in front of Dean.  
“Stop feeling sorry for yourself Cas. You haven’t done anything wrong here. You wanna save me or whatever then we’ll all try and find a way to make myself human again. But Sam is right on one thing. What’s done is done. Now I just got to live with it. Besides it’s not so bad being a night crawler.” Dean grinned and winked.  
It encouraged a crooked smile from Cas as he eventually let it go. His main focus was to help Dean now.  
“Does this mean I have powers now?” Dean asked.  
“Yes… I suppose it does.” Castiel realised.  
“Awesome! Can I… use them?” Dean seemed excited at the possibility.  
“Yes. Would you like me to teach you? But of course, I’m not a demon so I’m not sure if my methods will work.” Cas suggested.  
“Yeah, whatever. Let’s give it a shot!”  
“Okay.” Castiel opened the right side of his beige trench coat and began searching the insides of his pockets. He was looking for a small object to begin with. Cas pulled out a simple pen and held it up so that Dean could see before placing it down on the floor. “I want you to levitate that pen, Dean. All you have to do is imagine the pen lifting up into the air. Will it with your mind.”  
“Okay…” Dean mentally prepped himself and took a hopeful glance up at Cas before widening his eyes and staring intensely at the pen. Come on pen, float! Dean told himself and tried to imagine it floating in mid air. After staring for 5 minutes, his eyes starting to tire out, Dean huffed. Nothing happened.  
Castiel nodded. “Try again.” He said simply.  
Dean looked at Cas incredulously.  
“Try again.” He repeated.  
Dean rolled his eyes and went back to staring hard at the incredibly annoying pen, his eyes almost popping right out of their sockets.  
This time, the pen actually rose a few inches above the ground!  
Excitement sparked in Dean’s eyes and the pen immediately dropped back down to the ground with a click.  
Castiel clapped a few times. “Well done!”  
Dean grinned up at him as he began to understand that actually… he can do it!  
He tried one final time, wanting it to go higher and stay there for as long as possible.  
After one final minute, Dean had it levitating in mid air, halfway above the floor and below the ceiling. He allowed himself to feel pride, even if he was a demon, the powers are awesome and he can actually control it!  
“Perfect. Now let’s try something a little more difficult… me.” Cas stated.  
“y-you’re serious?” Dean stuttered.  
“Yes.”  
Dean cleared his throat, apprehensiveness seeping back into Dean.  
“…no, wait. You want me to lift you off the ground? Literally?!”  
“What’s so difficult about it Dean. You know you can do it now. Just try.”  
“What if I blast you through the ceiling or something?”  
“I’ve had worse.” Castiel shrugged it off.  
Stunned, Dean blinked several times, shook his head and thought ah crap.  
He focused on Cas. His trench coat, black boots, white shirt, stubble face, blue eyes, perfectly combed back hair. Everything. Hot. Shut up. Imagine lifting him quick.  
Dean pushed all thoughts right to the very back of his mind, focusing solely on lifting him. And all at once, the angel was lifted right into the air. Castiel’s wings slightly raised at the surprise of being suspended mid air. A warm smile crossed Castiel’s face and Dean’s short victorious laugh echoed the room. A full minute had gone by before he realised how long Cas had been in the air.  
“Dean. You can put me down now.”  
“Oh, right. Sorry buddy.” Dean chuckled.

Sam came back with various books on the interminable amount of knowledge of ‘Demons’ and Castiel thanked him.  
“Hey, look. I’m really sorry about how I treated you earlier. We we’re going to have to tell him sometime, right? And probably best you did it anyway. I wouldn’t have been able to get my head straight.”  
Cas smiled bashfully. “No need to apologise Sam.”  
“Well, I am so. Please accept it?” Sam asked politely.  
“Of course. And I apologise for letting you down.”  
“Eh. You didn’t.” Sam waved his hands brushing the apology off.  
Cas didn’t try again. He knew Sam well enough to know that he would cut him off and forget about the whole silly thing.  
“Well you two are adorable.” Dean joked, chuckling at himself.  
“Shut up Dean. Get reading.” Sam instructed.  
“Sure thing, cap’.” Dean’s sass would never dissipate.  
Sam only laughed lightly.  
“Besides, I think Cas likes you more.” Sam winked, dropping the bomb before fleeing the room.  
Castiel opened one of the books so that the next few minutes were less awkward as possible and rolled his eyes.

6\. Castiel was feeling the strain in his eyes and legs from sitting and reading for hours and it caused him slight irritation. When he glanced up to look at Dean, he had fallen asleep with a book on his chest and his head hanging back off the metal chair. Castiel stood up and stretched every muscle, flexing his wings too. He walked over to Dean and gently shook him by his shoulder, watching as his head bounced back up and his onyx eyes flew open. Castiel flinched. He was going to have to get used to that. Dean blinked several times, the darkness fading away again. He yawned and smiled up at Cas and realised he had the book still balanced on his chest. He motioned with his eyes to Cas as his hands were still tied up. Castiel made a somewhat sympathetic face and pulled it off him, closing it and placing it in the pile on the floor. “I think I trust you enough to let you out of all of this now.” Castiel gestured at the chair, handcuffs and chains. With a flick of his wrist, everything had dropped to the floor, leaving Dean dazzled. He had just been about to stop him too. Castiel trusted him, but Dean wasn’t sure whether he trusted himself.  
“Ahhh. Cas. I’m not sure that was the best idea?” Dean said unconfidently.  
“I don’t care Dean.” Cas simply stated.  
“Why? If I loose it now, it’s just going to be harder for you two.”  
“Because you’re still you. Try.”  
“Yeah…I really don’t want to hurt you two.”  
“I know. It’s going to be okay.”  
“I hope so.” Dean concluded.  
“We should probably get out of here. This room isn’t the best.”  
“Errrr, yeah that’s going to be a problem.” Dean said as he realised where he was now standing. Right in the middle of a pentagram.  
Castiel furrowed his eyebrows and dragged his expensive leather boots across it, defacing the red paint.  
“Don’t screw up your shoes Cas!” Dean exclaimed  
Castiel just looked at Dean with a confused expression, as his head tilted to the side.  
Dean waved his hand and said no more of it.  
They both walked out of the ‘dungeon’ and ended up heading towards Dean’s room, Castiel following close behind. When they got to the door way, Dean walked straight in, lying flat out on the bed to savour his freedom. Cas lingered in the doorway like a fictional vampire, needing permission to enter the room. Dean saw and rolled his eyes. “Come in Cas.” He instructed. Cas nodded his head and stepped into the room politely.  
“Are we not reading any more?” Castiel asked  
Dean stared at Cas quizzically. “Well I don’t know about you but 3 hours of reading? That’s a freaking lot!”  
“Dean you didn’t even read, you fell asleep!” Cas accused  
“Yeah! I did! Here, I even memorized the last page: demonic supernatural powers are believed to include: psychokinesis, levitation, possession, witchcraft, and curses, as well as binding and making contracts. Demons use variants and combinations of these powers to harass, demoralize, confuse, and disorient the victim. Yeah okay, we already know that bull shxt but still…”  
Cas nodded, accepting that he was, in fact, wrong for once. He never ceased to amaze the angel.  
“Come here a sec.” Dean motioned with his index finger.  
Cas gulped and walked forward.  
“Cas, I’m not gonna eat you. Relax!” Dean chuckled.  
Cas smiled crookedly and let serenity wash over him.  
“Was what Sam said true? About you liking me more than him?” Dean fired out.  
Cas was immediately stricken with blind panic as his brain scrambled for words.  
“I…I don’t want to… spoil our friendship Dean...” Cas stuttered out.  
“Cas nothing you could say would change my mind about you? Unless you told me you hated me or something.” Dean smirked.  
“No. I’m not… I can’t do this Dean.”  
“Cas, It’s me? You don’t wanna tell me then fine, but you could tell me, I don’t know, you…er, love me or something and I wouldn’t care.” Dean’s heart had skipped at the thought of Cas potentially saying those words to him. Deep down, he even hoped Cas would.  
“I think if someone said those words to you, you would care inordinately, Dean.”  
“Eh.” Dean shrugged his shoulders.  
Castiel sighed. “I know my feelings Dean. Do you know yours?” He snapped and turned to stride out of the room.  
“Cas-“  
Castiel did not turn back. Instead, he marched down the hall to the spare bedroom that the Winchesters had given him. He passed Sam on the way but did not bother speaking to him, which left Sam to stare at the back of Castiel’s head with a mystified look.  
Cas swung open the door so hard that it bounced off the wall and banged shut again. Cas sat on the bed, flung his legs over, crossing them and stretched out in front of him.  
His anger got the better of him as a tear slipped out of the corner of his eye and slid down his cheek. He was sick and tired of having to hide his feelings from Dean. To pretend that there was nothing there and to receive no signal in return whatsoever, except from the occasional glance, but even then, he had caught him off guard.  
He was tired of playing games and he was tired of this feeling that will not go away.  
He closed his eyes. He thought of heaven and all of his brothers and sisters, most wanting him dead or deceased. All of that rebellion. All of that homicide. All of those mistakes. Was it all Castiel’s fault? Well yes of course. After everything, he is still glad of the path he chose. It’s because he chose free will that he is here today. Castiel often wonders of how dull his life would be if he had been a good soldier, following orders that were not supposed to be given in the first place. Cas would probably be dead right now. He should be. Maybe he does owe it all to the Winchesters after all…  
He should really apologise to Dean…  
*Knock, knock*  
*Creak*

“Hey? Cas you in here?” Dean’s head popped round the corner. He saw Cas lying on the bed and didn’t hesitate to enter. He walked right in as if the room were his own. And techniquely it was…  
Dean carried on right to the bed, not saying a word. Cas adjusted his legs and brought them in close.  
Dean lent forward and took Castiel’s cheeks in his hands.  
Castiel held his breath.  
And then, he was taken aback as Dean’s lips mushed against his and Castiel’s eyes were drastically wide. Dean broke away abruptly to see Castiel’s expression. He smirked and took it as a sign of shock. Oh god please be a good shock.  
Castiel gasped in the air he hadn’t realised he needed till now.  
He couldn’t stop staring into forest green eyes.  
Both of their cheeks were blushing a shocking shade of scarlet.  
Until Castiel suddenly became doleful. “Did you kiss me because you feel sorry for me?” He whispered, not trusting his voice at any higher pitch.  
“No! I kissed you because I love you Cas.” Dean whispered back.  
“W-Really?”  
“Yes! Your stupid voice and hair and freaking blue eyes and how awesome you are in a fight and how adorable you are when you do that head tilt thing and yeah.” Dean finished lamely.  
Castiel pulled Dean’s shirt, forcing him to go up onto the bed with him and pulled the back of Dean’s head so that slowly, intimately, he kissed him again.  
Dean’s hands went around his waist and pulled them so that they both were even closer. Castiel moved his legs out so that Dean could crawl into the space.  
Their moans breathless, in short pants. Slowly, the kissing moved to jaw lines and throats and necks.

 

7\. They had finally broke apart again, Dean now had his head in Castiel’s lap as he idly played with Dean’s hair with one hand, and held the hunter’s in the other.  
“Well this is going to be a great story. A demon and an angel.” Dean chuckled.  
“I hope this doesn’t spoil our relationship Dean.”  
“Nah. It’ll make it better.”  
“Do you think?”  
“I sure hope so Castiel.” Dean teased, enunciating his full name. He brought their hands to his lips and kissed the back of the angel’s hand.  
“Dean?”  
“Yeah?”  
“I forgot to say it earlier… I love you too Dean.”  
Dean kissed Castiel’s hand again as he answered “I know.” with a cocky grin.  
And in that moment, Dean and Cas were the happiest they had ever been. For once, there was no self loathing, no hatred, no anger, and no pain. And the best thing? They didn’t need sex to feel pleasure. Simply being together was enough. More than enough. In that moment, however incredibly small, would stay with them for the rest of their lives, during and after death. They stayed like this in a warm embrace for some time. 

Eventually, Sam had to come looking for them to see what all of this sulking had been about. He walked into Castiel’s bedroom, not expecting them to be lying together. Things had been awkward and Sam had obviously turned away, but seeing them happy together had made Sam mouth a little Finally!  
They all spent the night reading and watching old movies and were currently about to get ready for bed. That’s where all the trouble started up again. Dean was in the bathroom washing his face when the most unbelievable pain rang in his head. It was one of the worst pain’s Dean had ever experienced and suddenly, there was nothing but rage. He could feel his eyes shifting from the luxurious green to the mystery onyx and it was like someone else had taken over him. He could feel himself moving towards the door. Thoughts inside his head were swirling around as a giant thunder cloud. Every single bad thought Dean had ever had came crashing down on his shoulders and he felt 10 pounds heavier. He threw open the door. Bang! Bang! Bang! It was like a personal hammer, designed to attack him inside his own head. Dean clung on to happiness, thought of his moments with Sam and Cas. It was preposterously hard but he clung on to them, with every fibre left in his body.  
Castiel rounded the corner; he slightly froze at Dean’s presence. His eyes. His posture. Castiel could already tell that something was off. “No.” Cas whispered. He took tiny steps up to Dean; he needed him to just hang on. A tear slipped down Dean’s cheek. He could feel himself disappearing, on the verge of falling. “Don’t come any closer Cas. Please I don’t want to hurt you.” Dean pleaded, shouting. He couldn’t help it. The rage was almost excruciating.  
“Dean. Hang on, For my sake, hang on!” Castiel continued ever so slightly moving towards Dean. “Cas… I... I can feel it… Cas. Please. Say there.” Dean’s eyes were filling up.  
“Do you remember when you stopped me? You told me “I need you.” I need you right now Dean. Don’t leave me.” By the time Castiel had finished his sentence, he had gotten dangerously closer to Dean, close enough to reach out…  
Dean was fighting, fighting so hard. He couldn’t speak any more. He felt himself reach out for Cas, just one more touch…  
He clung on to the back of Castiel’s head. “I love you Cas.”  
Just like that, Dean was gone. He could now feel himself inside his own head screaming out the words “NO! CAS! GO!” but no one could hear him. He had slipped into an abyss. Who ever, what ever was now controlling Dean was holding out a fist, a SMACK! Told Dean that the monster had hit Cas and the angel almost dived into the wooden floor, blood appeared down the side of his mouth, but Castiel got back up. “Dean. I know you’re there, I know you can hear me. I’m here.” Castiel panted out. The voice that replied was NOT Dean’s.  
“Shut up. Dean’s dead! I run the show now. Move angel.”  
Dean was truly shocked by the deep, dangerous, incredibly deep voice, He was fighting and fighting. This monster needed to be stopped. He screamed his lungs out, but nothing. Cas was not hearing him anymore. He even prayed.  
Castiel stood exactly where he was firmly. His faith in Dean undeniably strong.  
The monster had not said anything back. The power the monster possessed was incredible. With just a flick of his wrist, Castiel was sent flying backwards to the far end of a wall where he crashed through and the wind knocked out of him.  
“CAS!” Dean screamed inside his own head.  
The monster laughed.  
He strode down to the bunker’s entrance and crashed through the exit, disappearing in the dead of night. Dean trying to tame the monster, force it to go backwards. Ever so slightly, the monster had stumbled. But the monster only laughed again. “I can feel you Dean. You need to stop that.” The monster continued his pace and marched away, dreading the final destination.

 

8\. Cas was pulled up by his arms by a very confused, scared and worried Sam Winchester.  
“What happened?!” Sam exclaimed.  
“It’s Dean. He…” Castiel stuttered.  
“He… He’s gone?” Sam was behoved.  
Castiel only nodded in upset. He reached out, offering a comforting hand on Sam’s shoulder. Sam shrugged it off and took Cas in his embrace instead, needing to know that he wasn’t alone. Sam wrapped his arms around Cas and the favour was instantly returned.  
“We’ll get him back Sam. I promise you.” Castiel’s voice cracked but stayed incredibly firm.  
“I hope so. Cas? Don’t leave. I need you to help me with research and stuff.” Sam almost begged.  
“I’ll stay.”  
Sam broke away from the hug as he tried to figure out their next move. “Yeah. Okay, so. Think demon. Where would Dean go?”  
Cas thought aloud. “I think Dean may have gone to find Crowley, he is his ruler now. And if Demons and Angels are similar in one thing? They follow orders.”  
Sam nodded. “What do we do now?”  
“We stay here. I know you want to find him, believe me I want to as much as you do, but if Dean has really gone where I think he has? Crowley would be in the way and we would probably come back empty handed… But I don’t understand this at all, Dean is…Dean. No one is possessing him. He needs to learn to control it, realise that this is all himself.”  
Sam made humming noises in agreement simultaneous to nodding his head in deep thought.  
“Would you like to do any more research?” Castiel suggested.  
“I guess. It’s all we have at this point.” Sam replied.

…

A bark of laughter resonated from the king of hell. He stood in his shadowing long coat, complete black suit underneath. He knew that Dean would have to join him eventually, with the Winchesters it was always a game of chess. His new chess piece, Dean, smirking up at his new boss.


End file.
